Today, in my email, I got a special Plinky question that I really clicked with. It said: “If you ran away and joined the circus, what would your role be? Would you run a concession? Would you train elephants? Be a clown? Ringmaster? Why?”
I found this an amusing, endearing question because my relationship with this particular whimsical and archetypal childhood dream was more of an “imagine it and they will come” approach. Instead of running away to join a circus, I tried to create an environment and a vision that would inspire a circus to come to me. And through a chain of events that has unfolded over the past several years, a circus and it’s enthusiastic, surrounding community have sprouted up around that idea. So, I suppose my true answer, short and sweet, would be “Mother” or maybe just “Visionary”. Some kids dream about running away and joining the circus, I just decided to plant my own instead. I have a great group of leaders that have taken my vision and worked hard to make it a very beautiful reality. I’m grateful for them and I’ve loved watching my garden grow.
For quite some time now I’ve been suppressing a squee sort of obsession and I just can’t do it anymore. Charm Bracelets! (creative ways to capture and keep shiny tidbits and mementos really). As an adventurer and a collector of moments…..I love the idea of keeping little tokens that remind me of my adventures and people and special occasions and everything else that might make me smile. I also have a soft spot for the miniature. Floating around in my noggin are ideas for many different implementations of treasure keeping and I long to fuss with little shinies and tidbits.
So…This is the part where I make a plea. I’d like help with my new collection. I’m asking you to think of me when you find little notions and charms. Give me buttons you find, broken jewelry pieces, old keys, mismatched ear rings, little gears, tiny toys, shiny bits, pretty beads, costume jewelry pendants and micro figurines. Pocket these little treasures you find for me and add them to my collection when you see me or ask for my mailing address and make my day by sending them to me via snail mail. Anything very small, shiny, pretty and/or interesting. I want to collect and create stuff with these little mementos and I’m buzzing with excitement to see what sorts of magical trinkets I can find if my friends and their friends and even complete strangers help me look.
Feeblemindedjerk: rolls aren’t the same as curves. Are you fat?
Me: Depends on who you ask, I guess. Rubenesque seems to be an adequate description. There are pictures on my profile that could answer that question according to your opinion.
Feeblemindedjerk: Why do fat girls say they are curvy? curvy is like angelina jolie. ur fat!
Me: Oh gosh…I’m glad you told me. Here I was thinking that beautiful could come in more than one shape and that my height/weight perportions, while over the clinical standard for “average weight”, is represented well on my frame and when I look in the mirror I can like what I see and that’s ok. And if you hadn’t come along to correct me I might have gone my entire life feeling good about myself, and how that might tear the world apart…a “fat” girl with a self esteem. Thank you so much for your tactless hatefulness masked as “helpful honesty”. You’ve made me see the light.
Feeblemindedjerk: ur welcome. so u wanna hook up?
Seriously? Wow…I really just had this conversation. Where do these boneheads come from and how do they keep finding me? And also…screw him. I’m lovely. curves or rolls or whatever you call them…I wear them well. It’s taken me 27 years to get comfortable saying that much less feeling it. No random ignoramus from the great wide interwebs may take that from me.
Seriously though your period is like coming home one day and finding that your spouse has constructed this entire new baby bedroom inside your house and you have to tell them “Sweetie we don’t have a baby” and then your spouse FLIPS THE FUCK OUT like “The FUCK do you mean we don’t have a baby I…
I’m frustrated with myself. My sleep schedule is miserably out of whack and it’s starting to hedge into disrupting other aspects of my life. I need to summon some self control and get things back in working order.